Today’s blog is written by Laurie Loftin, who does not celebrate Valentine’s Day the way Hallmark tells her to
Valentine’s Day: a special date set aside for you and your loved one to acknowledge your undying love for one another with roses, chocolate, and candlelit dinners… Ugh. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. Personally, the thought of roses, chocolate, and candlelit dinners on February 14 makes me yawn. Throw in a sappy Hallmark Valentine’s Day card and a teddy bear and you will get me right to bed. Sleeping.
We all can do better than this for our beloved. Instead of trotting back to the trough to pull out another tired and stale notion of what is romantic, set in motion a Valentine’s Day rendezvous sure to create a special, unique, and lasting memory. As always, the Athens-Clarke County Public Utilities Department is here to help. Keep your passion from pooping out and bring the object of your desires on a fascinating tour of the North Oconee Water Reclamation Facility.
You may be surprised by this suggestion, but trust me. Nothing says “I love you” like taking your Number 1 to see the process of purifying your flushed waters of Numbers 1 & 2. Think of the tour as a metaphor. Similar to wastewater, relationships often come with a little bit of crap. But with a little effort, dedication, and devotion, you can navigate the waters and eliminate the stinky parts of love, creating a refreshed and long-lasting pool of passion from which to draw.
What can you expect on the tour? Romance abounds with carefully crafted stops offering the perfect backdrop for photos and stolen kisses. Feel the adrenaline rush through your veins as the wastewater flows through the aeration basin. Climb to new heights as you scale the clarifying basin. Let the bonding between microorganisms and phosphorous put you and your flame in the mood to strengthen the strange and extraordinary connection you share. Tickle the senses of sight, sound, taste, and smell with our alternative outing.
And you do not have to stop with the tour. Go all the way. Why not “poo-pose” while you are here? Give us a heads up and we can help you find the perfect scent o’ mental spot to pop the question. With some time to prepare, we can be sure to have plenty of toilet paper on hand for your darling to wipe away the tears of joy. If our proposal sounds like something you would like to give a swirl, let us know.
So, how do you sign up and keep this Valentine’s Day from going down the drain? Check your calendar. The tour is scheduled for Wednesday, February 14, 2018, from 12:00 – 1:30. Yes, this is the lunch hour. Light refreshments will be on hand, because who doesn’t want to eat while on this tour. Visit thinkathesink.com to register. We keep the tour size intimate, so space is limited.
You and your Valentine will share a new understanding and appreciation for the water reclamation process, ready to tell others that love – and water reclamation – does not stink.